Kurian Jose CEO, Tata Pension Management.
There is a growing debate about the role of emotional versus financial connect / dependence between retired parents and their grown-up children. With the growing popularity of the National Pension System (NPS) and other retirement avenues, this article explores why fostering an emotional bond with your children is far more beneficial than relying on them for financial support during retired life.
Changing family dynamics
Traditionally, children were seen as a financial safety net for their aging parents. It was made abundantly clear (through emotional means) that the parents were spending their hard-earned money on the education of their children with the expectation that the children would take care of them during their retired life.
However, with the decline of the joint family system and the advent of nuclear families and with children moving overseas or to another city for work, this model has been seeing a decline. This shift, though painful, has seen families redefine the nature of support they provide and receive, emphasising more on emotional well-being over financial transactions. Hence the need for financial stability during retirement without the need to be financially dependent on your children.
Towards for stronger relationships
An emotional connection fosters trust and understanding between parents and children. When children feel emotionally connected to their parents, they are more likely to engage in meaningful conversations, share their lives openly, and seek advice and comfort. Emotional bonds create a foundation for mutual support. Parents who invest emotionally in their children are more likely to receive emotional support in return, thus creating a nurturing environment that benefits both parties.
Emotional connections also contribute significantly to mental health for everyone. For both parents and children, knowing that they have a reliable source of emotional support can reduce stress, anxiety, and feeling of being alone, thus leading to better overall well-being.
Imbibing emotional security
The National Pension System provides financial security, reducing the need for parents to rely on their children for monetary support. This financial independence allows parents to focus on building a relationship based on love, respect, and emotional support rather than financial dependency.
Financial dependency can also sometimes lead to resentment or a sense of burden on children, especially in today’s world where economic / mental / work related pressures are significant. By securing their financial future through NPS, parents can prevent such negative emotions, fostering a healthier and more positive relationship.
Families that prioritise emotional connections tend to be stronger and more resilient. They can potentially weather life’s challenges more effectively and provide a supportive network for each member.
Emotional bonds leave a lasting legacy of love and care. These bonds are remembered and cherished far beyond any financial support, creating a lasting impact on future generations.
In conclusion, both parents and children experience a greater sense of fulfilment and satisfaction in their relationships when they are based on emotional connections rather than financial obligations.