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Most Indian families are conditioned to believe that the best thing in life is to have a close-knit family, where parents, grandparents, siblings, children, and other family members and friends entertain and communicate with each other. This is our comfort zone, our bubble, that we take for granted will always be there. However, as adults, we tend to assume that this atmosphere will continue unchanged, which can lead to discomfort when younger family members assert their independence.
In today’s digital world, teenagers often express their desire for personal space and autonomy, which can be unsettling for seniors. As Renuka Gavrani writes in her book, “The Art of Being Alone,” when a teenager says, “Maa, just leave me alone!” it’s a sign that they need more personal time and space to manage their lives.
Recently, I experienced a situation that made me realise how younger individuals prioritise their personal interests. We seniors may not have a choice but respect their priorities for harmonious living.
A WhatsApp message invited me to a gathering of family and friends. An RSVP was expected at the earliest. I was initially hesitant but then decided to attend, although it involved a considerable change to my routine, excited to meet loved ones after a long time. I was ready on time for my cousin to pick me up as planned. Unmindful of the traffic situation, merrily driving down, we chatted for nearly an hour before reaching the destination to usher ourselves in. Upon arrival, a fancy wall mirror welcomed us with a wall plaque that read: Some people bring happiness WHEREVER they go; others WHENEVER they go! That unsettled me immediately.
Oblivious to my discomfort, the younger lot were blissfully rushing in, hugging, cooing, and smiling for selfies to enjoy themselves. I felt a bit apprehensive as an introvert and decided to leave early. Was I overreacting, or was it a generation gap? I wondered if I needed to grow up or if the host was insensitive to their guests’ feelings.
This experience made me ponder the importance of respecting individual boundaries and priorities for harmonious living. As we grow older, we
may need to adapt to changing dynamics and learn to appreciate the
humour in life, just like the younger generation does.