'Same-sex marriage not a priority'

Voices from the queer community say they are not surprised by the government’s resistance to the idea of legally wedded gay couples

In response to a petition dealing with the recognition of same-sex marriages in the Delhi High Court, the government said that there exists a “legitimate State interest” in limiting the recognition of marriage to persons of opposite sex. They cited the “sanctity” of the “Indian family unit” and age-old customs. Metrolife spoke to members of the queer community in Bengaluru to ask how they feel about the statements.

Rohini Malur, a pansexual cis-woman and a founding member of All Sorts of Queer (ASQ), a group for queer marginalised genders, says that the statements are not new or surprising.

“It makes very clear that the Centre does not think of queer people as equal to heteronormative people. Their marriage has a ‘sanctity’ which we would ‘sully’. It’s an insult,” she says.

Anirudh, writer and trans person says that a government opposition to same-sex marriages was something that the community knew would happen since the reading down of Section 377. “During that verdict, the government said that in matters of the IPC they would leave the decision to the bench but if issues of civil liberties and social rights came up, the government would have an opinion,” they say.

Pushback for queer rights?

Rohini asks what rights specifically exist for there to be a push back? “The 2018 judgement doesn’t grant us anything except the right to have sex and not be arrested,” she says.

Treesa, a lesbian, says that push back of rights has already been happening with anti-queer legislation like the Trans Bill. “Moreover the term 'same-sex marriage' itself doesn’t acknowledge non-binary people or trans folk,” she says.

Anirudh adds that a lot of people on the ground, especially trans people don’t really look at marriage as a priority, “There are so many bigger concerns, such as corrective rape, murders of trans women, especially Dalit trans women.”

“I see the legalisation of marriage as another step in reducing discrimination based on sexual orientation. The fight isn’t ideological; I’m not fighting for queer folk to get married, I’m fighting against the fact that queer folk can’t get married. It’s a subtle difference but it is an important one,” they say

"As a country we haven't taken the time to understand sexuality and gender. We still view it from the colonial perspective. It's just a relationship, there's no difference in the dynamcis of the relationship from a heterosexual marriage," says Akkai Padmashali, transgender rights activist, Ondede.

She says they are planning to petition the Karnataka goverment to have better implemetation of the Supreme Court's judgements on Section 377 at the state level. "Our goal is for the community not to face stigma and discrimniation and lead a life with dignity," she says.

Focus on marriage

Treesa says that she always knew she can’t get married in India. “Marriage is a very patriarchal structure and I wasn’t planning on getting married anyway,” she adds.

And she isn’t the only one. A lot of queer folk believe that marriage is a hetero-normative concept. Then why this focus on marriage? After legalisation of homosexuality, marriage is always seems to be the next legal hurdle.

“Personally I think that needs to change. The way that we seem to be gaining our ascension of rights is trying to emulate cishet society and I don’t think that’s very necessary. it may even be counterproductive,” says Anirudh.

A lot of the more pressing concerns go under the radar, and it invalidates a lot of the relationships that are not marital in nature, they say.

“Queer people who can pass or are willing to assimilate into a hetero-normative society are going to be privileged over people who don’t want to do that. For example’, I don’t want to get married, but I would like to co-parent. I would like to have someone on my insurance policy and someone with whom I can open a joint bank account. These kinds of relationships are going to be second fiddle. We should work towards showing value to a myriad of relationships we have in the queer community. Display those and demand for the legal recognition of all those unions,” they say.

Anirudh is worried that if and when same-sex unions are legalised, the fight for recognition and rights for the wider queer community will be lost under a guise of progressiveness.

Rohini adds that the law is only one part of acceptance, and not always the relevant one.

“Our fight for our fundamental rights will go on a long time even if we win every single legal battle,” she concludes.

(Note: After the publication of this story, Metrolife was informed that Anirudh Gupta was accused of sexually assaulting members of the queer community. They have since apologised and stepped back from public engagements.)