Karnataka family seeks 'spirit' groom for child who died 3 decades ago

Matrimonial advertisements in newspapers are one of the many ways parents find suitable match for their children. However, a family from Puttur in Dakshin Kannada recently advertised for a 'spirit' groom for their child who is said to have died 30 years ago.

Traditionally, this ritual is termed 'Kule Madime' or 'Pretha Maduve'.

The advertisement published a week ago read: “Seeking a boy for a girl from Kulal caste and Bangera ('gotra'). The child died about 30 years ago. In case there is a boy of the same caste and different 'Bari', who died 30 years ago, the family is willing to perform 'Pretha Maduve'.”

What is 'Kule Madime'?

The traditional ceremony 'Kule Madime' is followed in parts of Tulunadu in coastal Karnataka regions of Udupi and Dakshin Kannada. It is performed in the same manner as a typical marriage, but between the spirits of the departed. Quoting the findings pertaining to the tradition, a report in Times of India said that 'Kule Madime' is a ceremony involving marriage between spirits of dead.

Given that this ritual is performed for the dead, it is part of 'Pitr Puja' or 'Pitr Aradhane' — meaning worshipping the ancestors. It is believed in Tulunadu that the aforementioned ritual would fetch salvation to the departed souls who died without getting married. It is also said in the regional parts of Dakshin Kannada that 'Kule Madime' also helps remove any obstacles in the way of prospective brides or grooms.

The advertisement

The member of the Puttur family who advertised the requirement for a 'spirit' groom told the daily that almost 50 people reached out to the family after reading the ad.

Stating that they would soon decide the day for the ritual, the family member said, “When placing the advertisement, we were worried that we would be trolled, but surprisingly, this has also led to a lot of awareness about the ritual. Interestingly, a lot of people from different castes have reached out, some even to know more about the practice.”

The member also said that the family is looking for a suitable match since the past five years.