What’s in a name? A lawsuit, for one

“What’s in a name?” are the oft-quoted lines from Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. Undoubtedly a rose would smell as sweet even if it had been given some other name. But a different nomenclature would have seen changes across the world too, as there are many who would probably have chosen to have “a rose” in their homes, based purely on the association with the fragrant smelling flower.

Hence, this “what’s in a name?” argument cannot be used so breezily. Hindi film actors, Saif Ali Khan and Kareena Kapoor had to face a barrage of angry criticism, besides being trolled online, when they chose the name Taimur (meaning ‘iron’) for their first-born son. The reason was the notion that the couple had insulted the country of their birth by naming their son after the Turko-Mongol Emperor and founder of the Timurid dynasty, Timur (known as Tamerlane), who had had the audacity to invade India. The couple pointed out the difference in spelling and stuck to their plans, after which the uproar died down.

This incident happened several years ago and the country has moved, since then, to turning its attention on areas, towns, cities, etc. But one can only surmise whether the latest development can be termed as progress. It appears that the choice of the name Noorie for the dog that Rahul Gandhi recently gifted his mother, is up for censure, with the courts being approached. The name has offended the sentiments of an AIMIM leader, Mohammed Farhan, as the name appears in the Quran.

Don’t know which way the case will go, but it looks as if it might be a good idea for the government to start something akin to a Department of Acceptable Names.  People could then approach the said department with a list of options for what they wish to name their offspring, dogs, cats, cows, birds or whichever other two or four-legged beings they hope to nurture in their homes. After the department approves the said name, an advertisement could be issued in a local newspaper announcing the choice of name and asking people to express their objections, if any, via social media. This would serve a two-fold purpose: One, the concerned party could save itself from a court case that would require a lot more shelling out than a newspaper advert; and second, this would help to boost the revenue of dailies and relieve them of the burden of looking for government patronage. They might even be able to shake off the Godi tag and start reporting news, without a bias.

With the rise in DINKS (Double Income, No Kids) couples, there is a new phenomenon that one sees everywhere called Pet Parents. Here, the pets become substitutes for children and could actually wind up in custody battles.

Who would know this better than the feisty TMC Member of Parliament from Bengal, Mahua Moitra whose ex-partner has accused her of kidnapping their three year-old Rotweiller, Henry.  He has alleged that this was to coerce him into withdrawing the cash-for-query complaint that he and the CEO of a real estate-to-energy group, Hiranandani, have accused Mahua of.

Among the many allegations, the most damaging is the accusation that Ms. Moitra provided her login credentials to Darshan Hiranandani, to pose questions against Gautam Adani in Parliament.

One would probably need a Sherlock Holmes to solve the mystery of the login credentials. Surely a smart MP like Mahua would have thought of password-protecting her phone from any such break-ins, or could it be Henry who was behind it all?  With such an illustrious legacy of a name with the eight King Henrys who ruled over England, there may be more to this Henry than meets the eye.

Shakespeare wrote plays on several of the Henrys, the most well-known being Henry the VIII who gained notoriety as much for his six wives as for changing the laws and religion of the land, to suit his ends.  

One can only hazard a guess on why Henry the dog was thus named, but it could well be the royal Henrys who were the inspiration. Considering the harm that England caused India, why is there no report of a police case against Mahua’s choice of name for her dog? Surely someone should have filed a case by now.  

Wonder what the Bard of Avon would have made of it all?  But there is one other quotation that he might have had to relook at. It might now have to be, “Hell hath no fury like a man scorned”, or one who has been deprived of his dog, I might add.

(The author is an independent writer)